Re: Puns, dad jokes, and bad jokes
Posted: Wed Dec 13, 2023 7:01 am
Satan and Suns
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Puns, dad jokes, and bad jokes
Page 2 of 2
Re: Puns, dad jokes, and bad jokes
Posted: Thu Dec 14, 2023 10:57 pm
I was thinking...
What would the Peanuts gang be doing ten years later?
I figure that by this time, Schroeder has traded his piano for a Strat and is playing Randy Rhodes to Franklin's rendition of Ozzy Osbourne in their cover band, Crazy Train
Linus would probably be the one smoking pot in the restroom, and maybe sneaking a few "special" sugar cubes into the Teacher's Lounge...
Wah wah waht wah wa-a-ah
Now you know why they always talked funny
I can see Violet as the popular girl, while Lucy would be the scheming bitch that nobody likes; and Peppermint Patty (Mistress Patricia to you) would be walking around in black leather with her submissive slave, Marcie, on a leash.
Charlie Brown, of course, would be riding his Harley down the halls with the little red-haired girls on the back
Off to class with my man, Charlie
Fa-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la
Ride to Home-Ec on his Harley
Fa-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la
What would the Peanuts gang be doing ten years later?
I figure that by this time, Schroeder has traded his piano for a Strat and is playing Randy Rhodes to Franklin's rendition of Ozzy Osbourne in their cover band, Crazy Train
Linus would probably be the one smoking pot in the restroom, and maybe sneaking a few "special" sugar cubes into the Teacher's Lounge...
Wah wah waht wah wa-a-ah
Now you know why they always talked funny
I can see Violet as the popular girl, while Lucy would be the scheming bitch that nobody likes; and Peppermint Patty (Mistress Patricia to you) would be walking around in black leather with her submissive slave, Marcie, on a leash.
Charlie Brown, of course, would be riding his Harley down the halls with the little red-haired girls on the back
Off to class with my man, Charlie
Fa-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la
Ride to Home-Ec on his Harley
Fa-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la
Re: Puns, dad jokes, and bad jokes
Posted: Fri Dec 22, 2023 12:48 pm
Just about everyone has heard of Poptarts.
Do you know why there are no Momtarts?
Because of the Pastriarchy
Do you know why there are no Momtarts?
Because of the Pastriarchy
Re: Puns, dad jokes, and bad jokes
Posted: Thu Dec 28, 2023 6:19 pm
What did the Mandalorian say when asked about his protein shake?
This is the whey!
This is the whey!
Re: Puns, dad jokes, and bad jokes
Posted: Fri Mar 01, 2024 3:40 pm
I don’t know if the rumour is true…
But I was told a long time ago that a pigs orgasm
lasts for a good 30 minutes.
One could google it….
I prefer to believe the rumour.
An old farmer had five female pigs. Times were hard so he decided to take them to the county fair and sell them.
At the fair he met another old farmer who owned five male pigs.
After talking a bit, they decided to breed the pigs and split everything 50/50.
They lived sixty miles apart, so they decided to meet halfway and find an empty field in which to let the pigs mate.
The first morning, the farmer with the female pigs got up at 5 A.M, loaded the pigs into the family station wagon and drove them to the halfway point.
While the pigs were mating, he asked the other farmer,
"How will I know if they are pregnant?”
The other farmer replied, "If they're lying in the grass tomorrow morning, then they're pregnant. If they're in the mud, they're not.”
The next morning, the pigs were rolling in the mud.
So he hosed them all off,
loaded them into the family station wagon again
and proceeded to try again.
This continued each morning for more than a week.
Both farmers were absolutely worn out.
The next morning he was too tired to get out of bed.
So he called to his wife,
"Honey, please look outside and tell me
whether the pigs are in the mud or in the grass?”
"Neither," yelled his wife.
“They're in the station wagon, and one of them is honking the horn……
But I was told a long time ago that a pigs orgasm
lasts for a good 30 minutes.
One could google it….
I prefer to believe the rumour.
An old farmer had five female pigs. Times were hard so he decided to take them to the county fair and sell them.
At the fair he met another old farmer who owned five male pigs.
After talking a bit, they decided to breed the pigs and split everything 50/50.
They lived sixty miles apart, so they decided to meet halfway and find an empty field in which to let the pigs mate.
The first morning, the farmer with the female pigs got up at 5 A.M, loaded the pigs into the family station wagon and drove them to the halfway point.
While the pigs were mating, he asked the other farmer,
"How will I know if they are pregnant?”
The other farmer replied, "If they're lying in the grass tomorrow morning, then they're pregnant. If they're in the mud, they're not.”
The next morning, the pigs were rolling in the mud.
So he hosed them all off,
loaded them into the family station wagon again
and proceeded to try again.
This continued each morning for more than a week.
Both farmers were absolutely worn out.
The next morning he was too tired to get out of bed.
So he called to his wife,
"Honey, please look outside and tell me
whether the pigs are in the mud or in the grass?”
"Neither," yelled his wife.
“They're in the station wagon, and one of them is honking the horn……